


just touch me like love won't

by saphinias



Category: Bandom, Fueled by Ramen, fun.
Genre: Anxiety, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, M/M, Non-Consensual Kissing, i'm not sure if it's an anxiety attack?, yeah i think that's it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-27
Updated: 2013-07-27
Packaged: 2017-12-21 11:52:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/899995
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saphinias/pseuds/saphinias
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A distressed Nate shows up at Jacks front door.</p>
            </blockquote>





	just touch me like love won't

Jack opened his door one night to an extremely ruffled Nate.  He hadn’t called or texted beforehand, and he stood on his doorstep running his fingers through his hair like it was a nervous tick.  His eyes were wide and busy.

"Nate?  You alright?"

Nate bobs his head up and down, taps his foot.  "Can I -" he swallows, his voice is hoarse.  "Can I sleep here tonight?"

"Yeah, sure.  But what’s wrong with your apartment?" Jack steps to the side to let Nate in.  Nate only comes in far enough to be out of the way of the door.  Jack closes it and turns to Nate, who is still tapping his foot and has switched from running his fingers through his hair to cracking them.  "Hey," he says softly.  Nate looks at him.  "What’s wrong?"

Nate drops his gaze and shakes his head, running his fingers through his hair again.  "I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know…"

He’s really starting to scare Jack now.

"Okay, that’s okay," he says soothingly.  He reaches out to touch him, and thinks better of it.  Instead he asks, “Nate, I need you to tell me where you were tonight.  Did you smoke anything?  Take any pills?"

Nate grins and looks through his eyelashes at him, and for a minute he’s fine.  "No, Jack, how stupid do you think I am?"  But then he lets out a shuddering laugh that’s verging on hysterical and he’s gone again.  Jack mutters a few colorful swears because isn’t that  _just_  like him?

"Okay.  Can I touch you?"

Nate’s head snaps up at that.  His eyes are still swirling fast, but they are slowing to a steadier rhythm.  

"Please," Nate whispers, urgent.

So Jack pulls him into a tight hug, and Nate buries his face in the crook of his shoulder, and holds Jack so hard he might have bruises where his fingers are.  Jack holds him tighter because he can practically feel Nate flying apart beneath his fingertips.

"Can I sleep in your bed?" Nate mumbles.  Jack inexplicably feels like a mother in that moment, comforting a child terrified of his nightmares.

"Yeah, sure.  You’re tired now?"  He can feel Nate nod.  "Alright.  Well, come on then."  And it feels wrong not to carry this oversized child to his room, to just lead him there.

Nate just stands when he’s in Jack’s room, looks lost.  So Jack pulls back the sheets and Nate toes off his shoes and climbs in and brings the covers up to his chin.  Jack turns off the light and joins him and is immediately clung to.  There is a hesitant moment before Jack reciprocates, and he feels like he’s walking on thin ice.  One wrong step could set him off.  Nate seems to calm down, though.

And then he is kissing Jack’s neck and he no longer feels like a mother, he feels  _used_.  He pushes him away.

"Stop, Nate."  Nate whines and his fingers search instead.  Jack pries him off, “I said  _stop_."

And then suddenly he is a mother again, because Nate pulls away and won’t meet his eyes and looks thoroughly reprimanded.  Nate sits up and brings his knees to his chest, wraps his arms around himself, curls his toes under.  Like he wants to disappear.

"I just…"  Jack waits, sits up.  "I just want…I don’t know.  I don’t know."

Jack knows.

"I know.  But you can’t just do that to people."

"I thought - it was stupid."  Nate gets up, starts slipping his shoes on.  He’s gonna run away.  "Sorry," Nate throws the word behind him as he runs out the door.

He doesn’t sound sorry, he sounds ashamed.


End file.
